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Transform Negative Emotions
How to transform a negative emotion into a positive one.
There are three very easy steps for you to take to
transform your state of being any time, read on and I'll
show you how.
If you think about it, who you are is a moment by moment
different state of being. What I mean by that is that with
each situation you experience, you will respond in a
certain way and then move into an appropriate state of
consciousness for that particular situation.
That is why you are always different in different
situations. You are responding to each situation depending
on the circumstances. You will never be the same when you
are making love as you are when you are talking to your
boss or your staff, your state of consciousness will be
completely different.
You are never fixed into one state of consciousness, you
change states all the time and the important thing to know
is that you can consciously change states very quickly and
effectively once you put your mind to it.
That means you don't have to be in a negative state, it is
not dependent on the outer reality, it is dependent on your
interpretation of your outer reality.
The problem is that we think that the outside situation is
creating our inner state, when in fact it is not at all. It
is the other way around - the inherent inner beliefs always
create what happens in the outer reality.
But because our emotions act so quickly when we see an
outer manifestation that we don't like, we think it is the
outer situation that is creating our inner feeling.
What is really happening is that the inner feeling, or at
least the inner belief has always been there, and to get
our attention to it, it creates outer realities that mirror
it perfectly.
Let me give you an example:
Lets say that you have 3 good friends, and you all decide
to go to the movies on Saturday night. One of your friends
realizes that she can't go because she has a previous
appointment that she had forgotten about and so calls you
to inform you. You then presume the event is off. In the
meantime, this friend that had called you manages to change
her previous appointment and bumps into the other two
friends just after she changed it. All three are happy that
they will all be going to the movies again on Saturday and
they all presume that one of the others will tell you that
the movie meeting is on again.
You however, are still believing that you will not be
meeting them and so they all meet and you are not there.
(Lets presume they don't have mobile phones and they call
your home and you are not there.) So they go watch the
movie without you. When you find out, you are so hurt that
you were not included in this outing and feel very offended
that they left you out.
You see it certainly looks like to you, that the situation
caused your pain, that the outside world, in this case your
friends, did something to you that caused you pain.
If you were to look a little deeper inside you would see
that you had a belief that you're not lovable or something
similar and because it is residing inside of you, knowing
that it needs attention, the energy of the belief creates
the outer situation.
So in this case you can see that because you believe you
are not lovable, a situation to prove that belief occurred
in your outer reality. It didn't happen to hurt you, it
happened only to wake you up to who you are and what you
believe about life.
If you are not ready to take responsibility for all of your
creations then what you would do would be to blame the
outer situation for the pain you have. This will give you
short term gain, you may feel justified and a little better
for a short period of time, but long term you will still
create similar situations that may be much more painful
each time until you get the message.
If, however you were to take responsibility for the pain
you experience, you may have short term pain, (the ego
doesn't like to be wrong) but you would uncover a negative
belief and then life would show up differently for you.
So if stuff that you don't like happens, its happening
because it's already there on the inner and the only way to
heal or transform it is to realize that on a deeper lever
you are the cause of it, absolutely.
This takes me nicely back to the three steps to transmute
any negative state I had promised you at the beginning of
this newsletter.
Step One:
Take full responsibility for the pain, that means you must
realize that the pain is yours, it didn't happen to you, it
was already there. Think about this a minute, you are the
one with the pain inside you, so it must be your pain.
You must really get this otherwise you will not be able to
transform the pain.
Step Two:
Align the judgement, that means tell your self it is ok for
you to have the pain. So often when we feel pain or not so
good about ourself we go into self judgement. This will
keep all the pain there, it can't move because you are
saying it is "wrong" for this pain to be here, so there is
conflict, the pain wants to move and your thoughts about
the pain, which are energy, are opposing the pain by
telling it it's not ok for it to be there. Remember it is
not wrong, it is just there to bring more awareness and
expansion to your life. So what you would do is firstly
say, this is my pain absolutely (Step one) then you would
say to your self that it's ok to have this pain (Step two).
This must happen on the feeling level, so just saying it is
not enough, you must really feel it is so.
Step Three:
Feel the feeling, now I know you may say, well of course I
am feeling the feeling cos I've got so much pain, but Pain
is resistance to feeling! I'll say that again, it is so
important - Pain is resistance to feeling! Thats why when
you have a good cry somtimes all the pain just goes away
cos you are finally letting your self feel the feeling
through. It doesn't mean that you will cry everytime you do
this, no not at all. You must feel the feeling thoroughly
though.
What I do to really feel the feeling is that I talk to the
feeling in the following way. Firstly I close my eyes and
identify where the feeling is in my body then I give it a
shape, colour, smell, texture, then I actually talk to it
and say, ok you can stay here, you don't need to leave,
even if you have to stay here forever I will allow it, in
fact I am going to love you. I know you are a valid part of
me. So come on give me your best shot, what does it really
feel like to have you inside me. Then I fully relax as best
as I can and really let the feeling do whatever it wants.
It is very important not to start thinking about why you
think you have the feeling, you must just stay on the
feeling, don't think about it, just feel it through till it
changes. It has to change, it has no other option once you
give it permission to be itself. It is just like life
itself, always changing, always in flux.
I have experienced tremendous laughter at times when the
feeling really moves, it is an incredible experience.
Remember, Pain is a resistance to feeling, so if it is not
moving it is because you are invested in keeping the pain
on a deeper level. Maybe you think you will get more
attention if you stay in your pain, Feel the feeling, let
it all be what it is then you are free and totally
liberated from your pain.
Cool
quote for today.
Never give up on your dreams, and never deny yourselves the
pleasures and material things of this world. For it is in
the reaching out and achieving your goals, where you grow
the most spiritually.
You never have to live in denial or live a life of quiet
desperation. Take control of your life. Live life to the
full. There‚s no real spiritual book in this world that
says you have to live a life of poverty or despair.
Go out and touch other peoples life as well, there is no
greater satisfaction, than to reach your dreams, and help
others do the same.
Dream big dreams, and never let anyone tell you its not
possible. No one wants you to grow and leave them behind?
Remember this, if you can imagine it, you can truly make it
happen.